On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
