Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
