a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
