So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Randomize
