I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
