break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
