i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
