Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
