i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
Randomize