Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
