and you said cock pushups were impossible
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
No subtext here. People are naked.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Randomize
