Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
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So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
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there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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