if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Randomize
