We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
