It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
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