at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
God, I missed his penis.
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