I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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