This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
