Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
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