Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Randomize
