The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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