I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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