what day is it and did you see me today?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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