Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.