I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.