There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize