We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
It's no shave November. This is our time.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
