I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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