I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
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being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
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Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.