my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize