Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
