my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
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