It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Randomize
