Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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