Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
i think we sleep fucked last night...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
