Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
