So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
