hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize