dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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