new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize