Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
