State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
