with your own penis?
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
