belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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