if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
