My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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