So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
This girl is more easily done than said...
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I intend to get homeless drunk
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Every concussion has its silver lining
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize