shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
