ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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