she woke up with a sticky ear
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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