1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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