remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics â¤ï¸
I have post one night stand depression
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