She is in my trunk
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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