another moral hangover. fuck.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
